Vegan Chocolate Mousse

Long, long ago, my husband was a ladies’ man. He and his equally suave roommate dated so many St. Louis Metropolitan women ages 20 to 35, they made Joey Tribbiani look like Urkel. Sure, they were young and handsome and successful. But the real reason women (me) enjoyed their company (refused to leave) was the chocolate mousse. When either guy wanted to impress a new female friend, he would make her chocolate mousse from scratch. (“It’s Darin’s mom’s recipe. She’d like you.”) It was a romantic yet precisely calculated move, resulting in swooning 95 percent of the time. Because really, when homemade chocolate anything is on the table, who can resist? Well, a vegan. If I had declined the chocolate mousse for ethical reasons (instead of licking the bowl and moving in), would there have been a fourth date? And the subsequent kids, dog, mortgage? If chocolate equals seduction, how do you woo the dairy-adverse? I searched for a vegan chocolate mousse recipe. Several called for mashing up avocados, adding unsweetened cocoa and drizzling the whole thing with agave nectar. It was just so weird; I had to try it. Now, I love avocados like I love a man who sends flowers. But if there’s a single slimy, bruised one in the produce section, I’ll inevitably bring it home (avocados, not men). If ever there was a time to select a decent avocado, this was it. I whipped up a batch of vegan mousse and casually served it to my husband without divulging the ingredients. He made a face that can only be described as a cat with a hairball. (It probably didn’t help that he’s ever-so-slightly allergic to avocados. Sorry, babe. Love you!) In spite of the other ingredients, the unsweetened cocoa made the mousse taste like dirt. I tried doubling the agave nectar – sweet dirt. I am an unapologetic ingredient snob. But maybe using premium, unsweetened cocoa was the problem. Perhaps bargain cocoa would be less cocoa-y, and therefore less bitter. Sure enough, I tested the recipe with two different, inexpensive cocoas. The cheapest cocoa yielded the tastiest mousse. The last hurdle was texture. My research recipes used a food processor to combine ingredients, but the mousse from our courtship was light as air. Trying to be clever, I used a mixer to whip in more volume. Duh. Know why those recipes used a food processor? Because it has a lid. Whirling beaters plus a pile of cocoa powder equals a giant, brown dust ball of doom covering the floor, ceiling and walls with cocoa film. Not ready to give up on my KitchenAid, I solved the problem by blending the avocado and cocoa by hand first, and then using the mixer. The mousse was tasting pretty good, but it still had a sharpness that would make it less appealing to fans of the real thing. I decided to finish it with a vegan whipped cream to smooth out the edges. A frozen banana blended with a splash of soy milk yielded a delicious dairy-free topping. Vegans, get ready for some ethical sinning. Kellie is an enthusiastic home cook who believes she can make anything if she just tries hard enough. However, she is still finding cocoa in the darnedest places. Follow her on Twitter @KellieHynes